bogeyandruby

I find myself in a quandary the past two weeks over a minor detail of my Christmas dinner planning. I have gone through the same dilemma three years in a row and have never managed to resolve it.

I probably shouldn’t refer to it as a quandary, it certainly isn’t a matter of life or death. Rather, it is more of a home decor question, as in which holiday arrangement should I order from my local florist?

You may say, why bother, and I wouldn’t disagree, it’s just that for the umpteenth year in a row I have zero Christmas decorations up and figured a vibrant center piece on my dining room table would make up for all that is missing and fool my dinner guests into thinking I actually cooked the meal I am catering.

Now certain plants are a no-no from the get-go. Research tells me the following are toxic to birds: poinsettias, holly leaves and berries, and mistletoe leaves and berries. That eliminates many options if we are to keep our four birds safe.

My mother used to have plastic ivy and berry decorations that she would use to dress up Christmas platters. Where they once might have looked tacky, vintage is back, baby. Unfortunately, we got rid of all of them when we purged my childhood home getting it ready for sale so that isn’t an option.

My other issue is colour scheme. I still haven’t decided which table cloth I will use, my lovely gold on white block print or the Christmassy one I forgot I had, discovered in the sideboard drawer I open once a year.

These questions lead me down another rabbit hole, if I choose the green and red version, will I have to buy another gravy boat to match? At least the red and green version would go well with cranberry stains.

I have reduced the list of possibilities down to three arrangement in the same price range though all of them seem to have some pesky berries.

Maybe I can pick the berries out. It would be convenient if they were fake. Or maybe I won’t bother with the living plants at all and look on Etsy for some vintage plastic greenery. I love fresh flowers but find it utterly depressing when they are in that in-between stage of vibrant and dead head. I get the same feeling unpacking dirty laundry from my luggage after a vacation or taking down Christmas decorations on a bleak January day, or spending all day cooking a meal, at least half as long cleaning up, with a grand total of five minutes sitting down to eat it.

I am channeling Eeyore, I know. But I honestly don’t miss what isn’t there.

If I really wanted to be practical, I could dig out my vintage Spode Christmas candlestick, a gift from an elderly friend who volunteered at a thrift store years ago. But which tablecloth would it go best with?